Look what Christie from Superstarra -ville sent me! And with the sweetest little card, too. I'm going to hug him and kiss him and call him George. Thank you, Christie!!

Uh oh, bad George! Stop eating Bob! Don't you know that he is made of Elsebeth Lavold Angora using size 7 Knitpicks Options needles? (Kim the Author: "Damn, that was smooth.") Well, okay, you look cute devouring his flesh. And he can't scream, because he doesn't have a mouth.

This baby elephant is not taking any chances. He sees George looking at him and licking his zippered chops and he is getting the fuck out of town. Or, er, the couch, as the case may be. Whatever, he will make friends with George later. After he survives. Note to self: Rename George, "Tsathoggua." Second note to self: Learn how to pronounce George's new name.

Across the living room, a slug attempts an escape by flinging himself over the armchair. If only he could unstick himself from the leather. Tsathaggua-George is so misunderstood. But once I fill him with stitch markers and measuring tape, he'll never hunger for knitted flesh again.

All creatures besides Bob are made using Brown Sheep Nature Spun, a reasonably priced, 100% wool, worsted weight yarn. I rate it 2 for softness, 9 for hardiness. Let's just say a lot of ripping happened to earn it that 9. I bought the patterns from Etsy vendor hansigurumi. Check her out, she's got a lot of adorable and unusual patterns. They're on Ravelry, too. I learned about hansigurumi from the fabulous Kathryn Ivy, who makes something beautiful just about every single day, and I totally stalk her.

P.S.

I can kitchener stitch now! And I learned the provisional cast-on. Knittinghelp.com is the shit.