Go Ahead, Make My Day
Warning: This is a virtually snark-free entry. I'm sorry, and I plan to return to a much more sarcastic place when I'm done being so, well, happy.
I have a confession. I am that person, the one with the blasted luck who never wins anything and never gets closer than fifth place. Well, I once won a pillow from my chiropractor, but I don't think that really counts because it was ugly and my insurance pretty much paid for it. Other than that, I've never won a thing in my life. I owe it to my laziness laid back nature and a possible gypsy curse.
But this year! This is the year for Kim! I've been given not one, but THREE "You Make My Day" awards from the following lovely people:

Sara of Bella Knitting
Nina of Knit in Denmark
James of subdue it with a sweater
These bloggers definitely deserve a million YMMD awards of their own, and from what I understand, I am now to spread the love to other bloggers who make my day. I wish I could just cut and paste all the people who take the time out of their day to leave comments here on Yarn Abuse because every. single. comment makes my day, without fail. And all the emails I've received because of this site, even the ones who are like, "I don't understand your pattern instructions," or, "I don't knit but I read your blog anyway." Because everyone (besides the occasional ass-face) has always been extremely sweet and positive. Everyone I've been in contact with through this blog/knitting groups/Ravelry deserves this award because, for lack of a better word, this has been the most rewarding endeavor I've ever undertaken. /schmoop
Unfortunately, I have that gypsy curse that makes me too lazy to post the thousand or so links to do that, so I will confine my acknowledgements to the following bloggers. These are people that I always look forward to reading, for their excellent writing and fabulous knitting projects. Plus, they seem like really cool people that I could down pitchers of girl-drinks with while gossiping about ugly patterns.
The 21st Century Hostess
haphazard knitter
The Knitting Knot
Micah's Reality Tour
Superstarra
Very Pink
Yarn Ball Boogie
Cashmere Blend
yaiAnn
I think my day has done been made for this quarter, because yesterday I made a trip to Kohl's department store to cash in some gift receipts and I came home with this baby:

I have absolutely NO idea how to use this, but hey, it's a first step. Also, if this is considered "lightweight," I would hate to try lugging around a normal one.
Dear anyone reading this who has any online resources for, um, instructions:
Please let me know!
Thanking you in advance,
The World's Happiest Yarn Abuser

Reader Comments (15)
I'd like to thank Blogger and yahoo and my neighbor who has awesome interweb service...
I'm the bestat downing the girly drinks. I love Cosmo's and used to drink them nightly in the bathtub untill they became popular and people started making fun of me for being a sissy. We'l all have to go get drinks after MS&W or something.
Hey, god use of the gift returns! I have no advice but I'd start out with some bags and sacks for kniting and stuff.
good to hear you keeping up with the yoga.
i really do enjoy the links to the other blogs
you have. it's my point of reference.
so, thanks for sharing!
(it did come with a manual, right?) easy peasy. it's like driving a car =)
Good luck with it! And enjoy all the ironing!
Go get some random scrap fabric and test it out!
I have issues with sewing, apparently. (And no, I can't help you with it -- but I wish you luck!)
Second, study what the manual says about thread tension carefully. If the tension is wrong you can get a huge blob of thread on the bottom of what you're sewing and not make a seam. Try it out of the box first, don't mess with the adjustments if you don't have to.
Another problem I've often had is putting the needle in wrong. If you have to change or replace the needle, check the manual about that too. Be sure the flat at the top of the needle shank and the groove along the length of the needle are facing the right way. You're probably good to go out of the box on this.
Then, what Micah and Finnyknits said -- play with random scrap fabric and then go to rectangular bags (straight seams, much easier than garments where you have to clip curves to keep them from puckering. When you get to a corner, take shorter stitches half an inch before and after the corner. Before you turn the corner right side out, clip diagonally across close to the stitching so you don't have excess fabric in there. Good practice for making collars and patch pocket facings. That's all you need to know to make a bag.)